In Africa, we are all conversant with the popular phrase “ If I Beat you” or “I’ll beat you”, either it was sounded to us by our parents or elders or you are probably the one sounding it to your own child. We apply aggression and violence as a way to correct your children’s mistakes. But does beating up a child always work?
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The answer to this question is undoubtedly no. You might have been wondering why after beating up a child or youngster for a particular offence or act, he/she probably return to that which you have shunned him against? This is because you aren’t applying the right method.
Beating up a child doesn’t help a child rather it dampers the child psychologically. We all know of how children who are maltreated behave socially; they generally isolate themselves from society and probably develop a form of hatred for the people who treat them poorly. I know you’re probably wondering, “But I’ll just spank him a little so he’ll know he did something wrong”. There is no such thing as a little spank; it is aggression and it inflicts pain on that child.
Someone may say, “But this child is too stubborn and needs to be thought a lesson”. Children naturally have this explorative instinct and drive to check out new things, experimenting on household alliances etc. There are more than one ways to catch a rat or in this case more than one way to treat a child’s misdemeanour.
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Some of these other ways are depriving the child of some privileges, this method is vastly used in western countries like the USA. We are familiar with the phrase “you’re grounded ”, In this method parents deprive their children of privileges like access to their smartphones, computers, video games, music players, and visits to places.
You may think but there are no such privileges available to an average African child. You may practice this method in your own way.
For instance, if your son loves his toys and he goes against your rules or commits an offence, you deprive him of access to his tea or cake for a period of time, reminding him constantly of why you decided to restrict him and advise him to change. This method has proven to be a very effective way to curb your child’s misbehaviour.
Certain times punishment doesn’t do the trick, you’ll have to imbibe morals and good character in your child by advising them. Tell them tales of children who behaved wrongly and how they ended in bad situations, you might even give reference to the bible or moral stories of your religion.
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